Expressoween

Weather:  43.  Or in terms of a Powder Layering System:  3

Disclaimer given:  no a pro.  don’t get hurt.  modify if needed.  etc. 

Thang:

As your boy was writing down the workout last night, I remembered how Abraham used to like starting a workout: Slaughter Starter* = 10 Burpees out of the gate. 

SSH – 10 IC

Spell the Alphabet with your feet.  Stole this from Fuse.  All Caps @ a 10 point font, San Serif.  

Humpies – 1o IC

Diamond Merkins – 1o IC

Outlaws/O Face – 10 clockwise/10 counterclockwise.  This was in honor of the scheduled Q, Dancing Outlaw.  

Asheville Abs x5 by Powder

Stolen from Splinter, Abraham’s Littlest, Meanest, Baldest son:

10 Hand Release Merkins

6 Squat Jumps

4 Burpees

Do that on the minute for the next 10 minutes.  I like this.  On average, you seem to get about a nice 10-12 second break between each rep.  Or in Retread Time, just enough time to blaze a fatty.  

Mosey to the pumpkin patch.  I don’t know the exact date, but 6 years ago when I posted either for the 2nd or 3rd time ever the Q – can’t recall who that was – took the pax to the PP.  We tossed the pumpkins.  We squatted the punkins.  It was just a good ole fashioned fun time with pumpkins.  “These guys are wacky.  What a good time.” – I thought to myself.**   

Overhead Squats, WW2’s, Curls, something else….

Mosey to the covered courtyard for lil ladder of Tricep Dips & Gas Pumps

Mosey to block pile:

curls x 10, curls x 15, curls x20, curls x?  By the last round no one was counting***

3 minute plank:  if you break plank, you owe me 15 burpees/15 squats AND resume planking.  Kapo tried to pull his best Used Car Salesman tactic and try to get me on semantics.  Just shut your pie hole and plank Ski.  

1 minute plank:  break plank, you owe me 10 burpees/10 squats AND resume planking. 

Time’s Up.  

WOD/Annoucements/Etc

*Slaughter Starter sounds a lot worse than it really is.  Just 10 burpees.  I move to change the name to Worse Than Side Straddle Hops.  

**Cross Stitch, I was more of a baller than a F3’r back when I first started, so there’s a 10,000% chance that I was wearing some And One’s to that workout. 

***Yall dorks can take your mutiny and shove it right on up your cornholes. 

ETC:

• If I were a bettin man, I’d say that I use the terms Cornhole & Pie Hole in a Backblast more than any other Backblast author
  • Either of those would be good FNG names.  
  • If given the choice, always pick Pie Hole over Cornhole.  
• A bettin man could also say that 8 out of 10 BB’s are author’d by YHC, so there’s that.
• Scheduled Q was D.O.  I don’t think many of yall know him, but if you do try to get him to come back.  He told Powder and I that we should take him off the list along with some other lame sh!t.  That never sits well with me, so try to get him back.  We have soooo many dudes that have come for a month and never return.  Creeper if you’re reading this, don’t even think about it fella.  
• Speaking of the good old days, yall remember when Flamer ran into a telephone pole guy wire?  
  • That’s a fairly random thought, but damn it was funny
  • Funnier than when Deuce did it at ER.  
  • I walked into a light pole one time when I was about 14.  In broad daylight.  It was because I was looking at someone’s boobies.  That was slightly embarrassing. 
• One cool side effect of Covid is that after each workout, there are usually a small handful of dudes that just stick around and chat.  It’s really enjoyable.  
• I suck at planking.  As my dad would say, I was shaking like a dog shitting cinnamon seeds.  
  • My pops is a proverbial fountain of euphemisms
• 6 years this month.  Makes me want to go EH a dude.