A: Hugh Damn Right
Weather: In a Fat Boy’s Wheelhouse
Route: Lil Old School Flavor for your boy here with lots of turns. Turns that were both hard to read on my cellular device & hard to describe. If you grew up with me, it would have sounded like this:
- turn and go towards that house where one of the Tester Boys ran the car into the side of and instead of running, got into a bed and pretended that he lived there when the cops came. 100% truth, by the way. Technically speaking, that was at the corner of 4th St NW & 14th Ave NW. Me and the fam were coming home from a movie and cops were everywhere. Tester was in the back of a cop car w/ handcuffs. It was the most bad assed thing I had seen since Eggsbee (he had an egg head) got speed wobble on a skateboard and cracked his skull open on the curb.
- turn on 5th St Cir NW. Pass by Herniator’s former residence, Joe Haines current residence, and the house where your boy grew up and right beside where Eggsbee busted his noggin open. NOTE: this circle was glorious. Tons of kids in the neighborhood. Your Boy was the youngest. Got my ass handed to my on the reg. We also had neighbors that had 4 peacocks. MORE NOTE: if you ever want to piss off your entire neighborhood, buy 4 peacocks. They are super loud and would fly around the ‘hood. Pops shot one w/ my BB gun.
- get back on 6th Street and head left. At that intersection when we had snow, me and Skins would hide out and throw snowballs at cars. We had perfect hiding spots, so we never got caught.
- turn left on Fox Circle, current home of Goodwill and Def Kahn 4, and former home of Skins, my childhood best friend. He was such a bad/good influence. We rolled many a house together, played in the creek between our houses. Harrassed his sister and brother. He also took me to my first Wolfpack game. He was my original Shield Lock.
- Turn left on 8th Ave; right on 4th Ave; right on 7th Ave; left on 5th St, current residence of Poupon, Powder, Dancing Outlaw, the Enabler, C Ed. I dare any other street to stack up a lineup that can even sniff our jock straps. Of course, my man Powder is moving, Poupon only posted twice, and DO is currently fighting a case of the Unsubscribes. They all live on the same soft assed side of the street. Coincidence? I think not. West Side holding down the fort since 2014, baby.
- Left towards Pukewood, down cemetery hill. Cemetery Hill: home of where me, Wormser, Stout, and Roach used to hide and throw tennis balls at school buses and/or enter the storm drainage tunnels, walk to downtown in them, and yell at people from inside the storm drains/curbs. Also the site where Pumpernickle dropped a 2 in the creek this am.
- Up Hospital Hill. Site of where my grandmamoms used to roller skate down that bitch. She lived balls deep, by the way.
- Left on 127. Past the house where Goodnuts and I used to throw biscuit dough at cars….got caught by the police too. Yikes.
- Up to former site of Copperbean, run down past Tooth Fairy’s house where sugar plums were dancing in his head. Around Lake Hickory CC, where your boy used to throw dinner mints and unsuspecting folk.
- Left towards Corinth, call it a day.
Lessons learned:
- Your boy used to throw just about anything at just about anyone/anything. Watch your Six, eh?